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The perilous Ha-ha

August 8, 2012

Ha-ha or Haw haw


  1. a wall or other boundary marker that is set in a ditch so as not to interrupt the landscape




“Be careful of the Ha-ha, sir and madam,” the thin disapproving woman said.

I looked at Adam and tried to hide my smile.

“We will, Mrs. Danvers. And again, Mr and Mrs Stewart is fine.”

The woman sniffed and said: “It is difficult to climb out if you fall in.”

Adam’s blue eyes crinkled at the corners in the way I loved, that meant he was taking the piss.

“We will call you if we do, and you and Mr Danver’s can give us a hand out. If it’s this dangerous, perhaps we should fill it in.”

Mr Danvers, a stout man that reminded me of a pigeon, looked horrified. ”But it keeps out the peasants. Mr Stewart.”

I smiled goodbye at them both, not wanting to talk any more, and took Adam’s hand, dragging him out onto the stone terrace. I skipped a bit, I couldn’t help it. This house was something out of Period House and Garden. And we had bought it. Adam smiled at me, happy to see me pleased.

“The peasants got in though, didn’t they?” I said, turning and taking both of his hands in mine.

“No ha-ha could keep us out. We vanquished the ha-ha with a simple cheque.” I kissed him.

We walked hand-in-hand down the stone steps, and across the lawn. We fell into step with each other, and on an unspoken agreement went to see the ha-ha.

“Do they bother you that much? The Danvers? We could give them notice.” Adam’s voice was reluctant. So was I.

“It seems a shame. They have lived here all their life. And they will retire in a few years. Once they get used to us it will be better. We can’t expect them to forget the way Lord and Lady Bonnet did things that quickly.”

“True. Its you that has to put up with them most.”

“I’ll charm them eventually. They are just sad that we’re not landed gentry. Do they even know what computers are?”

As we talked about our good fortune in having Adam’s tech company go public, we covered the lawns quicker than I thought we could. We were suddenly at the ha-ha. A long trench, wider than we expected, and very very deep. In fact, I couldn’t see the bottom.

“They really hated peasants, the Bonnet’s didn’t they? I wouldn’t like to fall in there.”

Adam frowned and lent over the edge.

“We’ll have to fill it in, its dangerous like that.” We both peered into the darkness. I shivered a bit.

“Let’s go back.” I said. Adam nodded, and turned. He gasped.

Behind us, a few meters away was another ha-ha. It blocked our route back to the house. I screamed.

“Is it, is it moving?”

We turned and ran on the narrow strip of green between the too falls, hand in hand. But the green became narrower and narrower. The two ha-ha’s became one, and we started our long fall.

The ha-ha really didn’t like peasants.


Next entries noun:



Word forms: plural iambs, iambi (aɪˈæmbaɪambuses (prosody)

  1. a metrical foot consisting of two syllables, a short one followed by a long one (◡ –)
  1. a line of verse of such feet

From → Definition

  1. This was fun!

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